Routines...

Every night when I go to bed, I map out the next day in my head. Whether I'm working, going to school, or have the whole day to myself, I feel like I have to create a schedule to stick to for the following day.

Take today for example:

Wake up between 7:30 and 8:00

Eat a delicious breakfast!

Go for a bike ride with the padre around 9:30

Get back around 11:00

Do an ab workout

Shower

Grab a quick bite to eat with the momma and see Winnie The Pooh


Grocery Shop

Pack lunch and do some planning for work tomorrow

Eat dinner

Read or watch a movie

Be in bed before 9

While it's great to be scheduled and have routines, I also find them very limiting. Schedules definitely allow me to be productive, busy, and keep me from worrying too much. However, I also think that scheduling every little detail of my day takes a lot of the fun and spontaneity out every day life.

In the depths of my eating disorder, I'm not really sure if I scheduled my day like I do now. I know I was very obsessed with routines, but to be honest, I didn't do much with my day besides obsess about food I was allowed to eat, food I wasn't allowed to eat, calories, body weight, etc. While yes, I had friends...yes, I went to school, yes, I spent time with family.....my mind was always on food.

There was a time last year, when I felt totally free from my eating disorder. I really didn't care about schedules and routines at all. I always wanted to be busy, but last minute plans didn't bother me one bit.

I could be dressed in my pjs, getting ready for be, when a friend would call and ask me if I wanted to go to a party....SURE! Why not? 

I could get a text on Saturday morning asking me if I wanted to go camping for the night! Of course, see you in a few hours!


During this time, I was all for having fun while experiencing and taking in as much as possible. I would often schedule my day, but I didn't care if I stuck to the schedule I created or not. While I think I took this a bit too far last year and got to the point where I was saying yes to everything and felt like there was something wrong with me if I didn't have plans, I miss the carefree attitude I had.

While I definitely am still very productive, don't think about food 24/7, and for the most part, live a very balanced lifestyle, I think I am clinging to my routines too much. I do this partly to combat my irrational eating disordered brain.

If I schedule time with friends, I will never isolate myself.


If I schedule exercise, I won't overdo it or under do it. 


If I schedule time to myself, I won't burn out.

While all of these things are true, the truth is sometimes....

I don't feel like exercising when I am scheduled to...


I'd rather go for a bike ride than a run...


Friends ask me to do things last minute...


Plans fall through...


I can't predict what I am going to want to eat tomorrow....


The list goes on and on.

I think I am going to try to be more spontaneous this week. While I'll probably still create schedules for myself, I'm not going to act like it's the end of the world, if something doesn't go according to plan.

When plans with friends fall through, it doesn't mean there is anything wrong with me. It just means our plans didn't work out. Why can't I simply exist and enjoy time with myself?

When we are out of grape jelly, I don't need to throw a hissy fit because I can't make a pb&j for lunch. I can improvise and make pb&honey. Variety is the spice of life. 


When I plan to stay home, and I get a last minute text asking if I want to go to a bbq, I don't have to stay home because I planned to. I can go out and have fun with some friends. 


Breaking routines is a lot easier said than done, but I'm vowing to work on it.

Today for example, I followed my schedule for most of the morning.

I woke up at 7:30

Ate breakfast

Went for a lovely 15 mile bike ride with my dad

Taking a picture of yourself while biking is not 

an easy task. 

Covered bridge

Beautiful lake views

and some mountains!

and then did an ab workout blogged instead because that is what I felt like doing.

Now, I may do an ab workout before I shower and head out with my mom, but if I don't, life will go on, and everything will be okay better than okay because I'm listening to my body and myself!

Questions:
1) Do you create routines and schedules for yourself?
2) How do you handle not being able to follow your schedule? I often turn into a two year old and throw a temper tantrum about the most trivial things. I need to work on this.
3) Are you relaxing and enjoying your Sunday?

 

Lobster

I'm a vegetarian and never was a seafood fan anyways, so no I did not eat lobster.

However, I sure do look like one....meeehhhh. I'll explain in a little bit. First, I want to recap my weekend for you all.

So far, I've had a pretty eventful and fun weekend. One of my best friends from school came back for the weekend. Last night, I hung out with her after work. We ended up getting dinner at Boloco. It's a really fun, wrap/burrito place. They have tons of healthy options and you can make a custom wrap or burritio. I had a brown rice bowl with tofu, fajita veggies, romaine lettuce, carrots, broccoli, and teriyaki sauce. I was too busy enjoying my food and the conversation to snap a picture. Sorry about that guys. After dinner, we just talked and caught up for a couple hours. It was a relaxed, but fun Friday night.

Two peas in a pod...or in a South Carolinian Aquarium in this 

case : )

This morning, I woke up around 7:30am, which is early for a Saturday, but much later than my usual 5am wakeup. I ate breakfast which I also forgot to snap a picture of. Sorry, I have been really bad at taking pictures this weekend. Digested and completed a 4 mile run. While the run wasn't too long, it was certainly hilly and got my heart pumpin' hard and my quads screamin'!

Okay, so maybe the hills didn't look like this, but they were tough

nonetheless! 

Post run, I showered, packed a lunch, picked up my friend, and headed to the beach. It was a perfect day to visit the beach. Warm and sunny!

Sunny and sandy...just the way I like it!

Unfortunately, I didn't pack sunscreen, so I got a little burnt to say the least. Since, I am outside at camp all the time, I have developed a pretty good tan, so at work, I never burn despite being outside in the heat all day. Well, at work, I also don't wear a bikini. I'm usually sporting running shorts, a sports bra, and a tank top. When I'm swimming or we go to the beach on a field trip, I have to wear a one piece, so my mid section is still rather pale. I do run in just a sports bra sometimes, but since I don't run laying down, my mid section doesn't get much sun. To make a long story short, my back currently resembles the backside of a lobster....red as can be. Ouch!

Sorry for the awkward picture. I'm just trying to show 

my poor sunburned back. 

Had to take a classic mirror pic after..I'm 

such a dork!

After returning from the beach, my parents took me out to dinner. Now, I'm just relaxing and watching a movie. Never Let Me Go....It's so good pretty far.

Tomorrow, I'm going to go for a long bike ride with my dad...tomorrow is a running rest day--meaning I'm not running. Lately, I've been pretty good at not running everyday and doing more cross training!

Afterwards, my mom is taking me to see Winnie The Pooh. I've been waiting to see this movie for two weeks. I finally convinced someone to see it with me. And who better to relive your childhood and see Winnie with than the momma?

Would you happen to have some honey? 

Have a good night amigas!

Oh, and hopefully I can share my good news with you soon. I'm just waiting for one final thing! Sorry about the ambiguity.

Questions:
1) Are you enjoying your weekends? I hope so!
2) Runners....is it hard for you to cross train instead of run? And, what type of cross training do you do. I feel like cross training does wonders for my body, but I always feel guilty because in my disordered mind, running is the best workout. So, I should run everyday, right? Wrong! 

Sorry

For the lack of postage that is.

I've been pretty busy the last few days, but I'll post soon.

I Promise!

I think I may have some good news to share with you all. I just don't want to jinx it.

I'll fill you in soon : )

Enjoy your weekends loves.

It's A Love Hate Sort of Thing!

What am I talking about?

Chocolate? No, I just love that....there's no hate involved : )

Kiddies? No, they are too cute to hate!

Mosquitos? Nope, I just plain hate them!

I'm talking about early morning runs. I have really mixed feelings about them.

I only run at the crack of dawn when my schedule necessitates it. Or, when I have a really busy morning. I hate running in the afternoons.

When I have the whole day to myself, I choose to run mid morning. I get up fairly early....around 7ish. Enjoy a wonderful breakfast, drink a cup o' joe, digest a bit, use the bathroom (sorry if that's too much info), and head out the door around 9.

Because I am at work, though, 5 days a week, from 6:45AM to about 5PM, my morning routine gets cut drastically short, and I have to adjust my running schedule. I can take my lunch early in the morning and go for a run, but a lot of days I don't feel like doing this for two reasons:

1) I have a bad habit of obsessing and worrying  thinking too much about my workout until I get it done. When I put off my workout until later in the morning, I spend the morning thinking about my run instead of enjoying time with my counselors and campers. Bad habit....I know I need to break it.

2) My work is located on top of a hill. No matter which way I run, I run downhill. If I go on a four mile run, I spend the first two miles coasting down hill and then the last two miles trudging back up. Not fun....not fun at all.

Because of this, I often wake up at 5AM, put on my running shoes, and get my behind out the door within 5 minutes of waking up. As the title of the post implies, I kind of love this and kind of hate it.

What's to love?

Running with the sunrise!

Being half asleep through the first couple miles of the run. When I finally feel awake, my run is half way over.

Finishing my run before 5:45 AM...before a majority people are out bed.

Not having to deal with thinking about my run for the rest of the day.

And, here's what I hate!

Dreading the sound of my alarm in the morning because I know I have to get straight out of bed and on to the pavement.

Umm...not using the bathroom ahead of time makes for a little stomach discomfort towards the end of my run. Have to have a cup of joe or some breakfast in me to use the bathroom. Sorry for the TMI once again : /

Having my legs feel like jello by the end of my run because I haven't fueled up yet. I need to experiment more with having something small to eat before I head out.

Having this for breakfast because I don't have time for anything else and because I eat at work to save time.

Recycled pic, but it's what I had for breakfast this morning...except

the clif bar was of the chocolate peanut butter variety!

As you can see, I have mixed emotions about running at the crack ass of dawn. Luckily, camp is coming to an end (I'm sad about it for other reasons). I'm working at another camp after the end of this one for a couple weeks, but I don't believe it starts so early.

And on a completely random note, here's what I had for dinner!

Sorry for the crappy Iphone pic. I was trying to be discrete 

at the dinner table. Fake meat taco with a side salad. Wednesday

is taco night once again in this house. Fine by me : )

I was going to do a WIAW post, but I packed my lunchbox before remembering to take pics. Also, when I thought about it, my eats were pretty similar to last week, so I didn't have anything really too exciting to share. Sorry guys. 

About the barbecue mentioned in yesterday's post. I decided not to go. Two of the coworkers I am closest with weren't going, and after working 10 hours, I'm tired and honestly would rather be in bed by the hour of 8:00pm. I know I may regret not going, but that's okay. The staff dinner is next Thursday, and I'm definitely going unless some dire circumstance presents itself. Hold me to it!

Night chicas! (And chicos if there are any)

Questions: 
What are your thoughts on early morning runs? 
When is your favorite time of day to run? 

The Dilemma

I'm pretty sure my post title is the name of a movie, but I'm pretty sure you guys aren't going to sue me for copyright, right?

Not too much exciting happened at camp today. It was kind of a rainy day, so we were unfortunately stuck inside most of the day. It was kind of a long and boring day. I spent way too much time today, however, thinking about something.

What was I thinking about?

Whether are not I want to go to a barbecue tomorrow night. Last week, one of my coworkers told me he was having a barbecue at his house this Wednesday (tomorrow) and that everyone at work was invited. Initially, I was pretty excited about this. I really do like a lot of the people I work with, but it's hard to have real conversations with these people with hundreds of kiddies around you all the time. Conversations are always interrupted with campers beautiful voices....

Can you take me to the bathroom? 


He cheated!


What are we doing next? 


When are we going swimming? 


Kristy, I'm working on a duplicate machine. It makes copies of people, but I won't be done until tomorrow. (Yes a camper actually told me this today)


Anyways, I would really like to spend time with my coworkers outside of work. Last year, one of my best camp memories was the staff dinner we had at the end of the summer. We all let loose, had a few drinks, poked a little fun at each other, talked about how cute some campers are and how evil  misguided? other campers are. My camp is having an end of the staff dinner again this year, but that isn't until next week. This barbecue is just another fun opportunity to bond with coworkers.

Although part of me really wants to go, another part of me thinks it would be better to skip out. I'm just having a hard time deciding if it's "Ed" telling me to stay home or if it's actually prudent to maybe skip out on this one.

Let's get real here...

This barbecue is on a Wednesday night, and I have to be to work by at least 7AM on Thursday...


I'm going to be exhausted tomorrow night after working 10 or 11 hours and be ready to relax...


I'm sure some casual drinking is going to be involved, and personally, drinking during the work week doesn't really work well for me...


If I go, I will really have no time to myself from 7AM tomorrow morning until 5PM Thursday evening when I get off of work....


I'll be super tired Thursday if I'm up late on Wednesday... 


One of my best coworker friends isn't going, so I don't feel as compelled to go...


At the same time, I know there are some "Ed" thoughts playing into this...

What type of food will there be? I'm supposed to bring something to grill, but if I just bring a veggie burger will there be buns, sides, desserts, and other stuff? Will I starve? Will I indulge too much? 


Alcohol equals unnecessary calories. Although I'm okay with drinking maybe once a week, I don't want to feel bad about drinking this weekend if I end up drinking tomorrow....


I have to stray away from my routine, which is super hard for me....What will Thursday be like if I don't get enough sleep? Maybe, it's better to stay home, have my me time, and eat my normal foods? 


As you can see, I'm quite torn. I do have some good reasons not to go. If this barbecue were on a Friday night, I'd be all for it, but it's right in the middle in a long, tiring work week. Also, the staff dinner is only a week away, so if I miss out on this one, there's still that to look forward to. However, I feel like I'd have fun going and even if I didn't, it's only one night out of my life. One night away from my routine is not going to kill me.

I think I'm also afraid to not go because whenever I chose not to participate in something social, I always assume it is for "Ed" reasons. This line of thinking lead me to be frantic last fall and so busy and social that I could barely see straight. I need to accept the fact that it's okay to decline invitations sometimes. I don't have to do/go to everything.

So here's where I'm at....

If I decide to go tomorrow, great! If I decide to stay home, great too! I'm going to go throughout my day and not stress about it too much. If I feel like going tomorrow evening, I will. If not, I'll stay home. I need to learn that I don't have to plan everything. It's really okay to just go with the flow. Really!

Now, I'm going to enjoy this delicious dinner. It's a go to dinner when I have to cook for myself and am feeling lazy crunched for time.

Whole wheat spaghetti noodles, stir-fried red pepper, carrots, and 

brocoli, and lighthouse peanut dressing/marinade (surprisingly, peanut

free!)

Happy Tuesday everyone!

Questions: 
1) Do you struggle to stray from your usual routine?
2) Do you find it hard to be social and commit to social gatherings during the workweek? On the weekends, I tend to be all about them, but when I'm working, I definitely crave routine and me time. 

Magic at the Movies

Happy Monday everyone! And, no that isn't an oxymoron.

Before jumping into today's post topic, I wanted to thank everybody for sharing their advice and experiences with wordpress. I think I'll definitely make the switch. Sorry, blogger. I probably won't "move" though for another couple weeks when camp is over and I have some more time on my hands. 

Moving on..yesterday I grabbed a quick bite to eat a local deli with a friend (no pictures....sorry : ( ) and then headed to the movies to see Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows Part II for the second time. Yes, the movie is definitely good enough for a second viewing. I really wanted to see Winnie the Pooh, but I couldn't convince my friend (or anyone else for that matter) to see it with me.

Such a good movie....the books are way better than 

the movies, though...just sayin'

Personally, I love the movie theater. There's something magical about dropping $10 to get in, and an additional $4 dollars for a bottle of water (I'm not sure why the theater won't let me help the environment and bring in my own bottle), and occasionally, drop $3for small bag of m&ms or $4.50 for a kiddie popcorn. Honestly, I don't mind, and I'm usually quite the tight wad. 

I really love the feeling of walking into the lobby, smelling the over-buttered popcorn, and knowing that I can forget all my problems (however significant or trivial they may be) and immerse myself in a different world if only for a few hours. 

It gets even better as you enter the theater, find the perfect seat (2/3rds of the way up) and wiggle your way through the crowds of people to sit down.

Magical? 

Then come the previews, which are by far my favorite part of the movie. I hate it when I'm running late to a movie and someone tells me, "don't worry, you'll just miss the previews." Trying to keep my cool, I step on the gas or start walking a bit faster because there is no way I'm paying $10 and missing the previews. 

Finally, the movie itself starts to play and I get all giddy inside! And when it's over, I feel refreshed and ready to take on the world!

Sometimes, I'm surprised by how much I love the movie theaters because, to be honest, I have the attention span of a fish. I have a hard time sitting still and focussing on anything for two hours. I don't really watch much tv, and when I watch movies at home, I often get bored or ancy, and decide to open a book, check my email, read blogs, etc., and quickly lose track of what is going on in the movie. Thus, I become bored and quit watching all together. I am able to watch and enjoy movies at friends' houses, though, because I would look rather odd if I suddenly opened a book mid movie or brought and popped open my laptop I'm out of my normal environment. 

I do apologize if this post is kind of boring or random, but it's something I've been thinking about all day.  Besides, not much interesting happened today to report. Well, I did have to suspend a camper from camp for behavior issues, but I wanted to keep the post positive. 

Oh, I also had a good workout today (totally random, I know)

25 minutes elliptical

5 minutes stairmaster

NROLFW Workout 4B

Oh, and dinner was also a highlight of my day...

Whole wheat spaghetti with smart life fake meatballs (hidden under

all that sauce), natural marinara sauce, and a salad with ginger dressing

Have a good evening everyone!

Questions: 

1) How do you feel about the movie theaters?

2) Do you sneak your own food in? I admit it. I sometimes do, especially when I see a movie during lunch or dinner time. I'm sorry, but a bag of popcorn does not count as lunch. 

3) Nutrition aside, what's your favorite movie theater treat? Before ED days, I would have to say either the Sourpatch Watermelons or the Chocolate Covered Cookie Dough bites (grossly delicious!)

Wordpress?

It's Sunday evening and that unfortunately means the weekend is coming to a close. I don't mind, though. I get to see all my campers' smiling faces early in the AM! 

I'm just popping in quickly to ask your opinion about something...

Is wordpress better than blogger? Or, are there any other blogging sites that are better than blogger?

Although I like how simple blogger is, I'm not a huge fan of the layout options and inability (it could just be that I don't know how) to follow blogs that aren't blogger based. I'm also hating the fact that I can't reply to individual comments. 

Experiences? Thoughts? 

Simmerin' Saturday

Hello blogaroos,

It's still hot in the Northeast. Despite the heat, I hope you all are having relaxing and wonderful weekends to recharge your batteries for the week ahead.

I don't have anything super important to talk about in the midst of this heat wave nor did I do anything super exciting today, but I had a fun day nonetheless. I thought I'd just recap my day and my eats for you all.

I woke up at 7am this morning. I know that's early, but I get up at 5am for my job on weekdays, so it's hard to reset my body's clock for the weekends. To be honest, I woke up and was wide awake at 4:30am this morning. Seeing I went to bed around 11:30 last night, though, I knew I needed some extra sleep, so I forced myself to go back to sleep.

Upon waking up this morning, I laid in bed and watched two episodes of this splendid show....

I must admit, it's not as good as the original. I miss

my Randy!

I then headed downstairs to put some breakfast together. I was craving chocolate this morning, so a chocolate covered strawberry bowl it was.

2% Strawberry Fage, chocolate Vitatop, Teddy's PB w/ ground

flaxseed, sliced strawberries, and some 'nanner...yum!

One delicious breakfast and two cups of coffee later, I got dressed and headed to the gym. Usually I put in a long run on Saturdays. After running at 5am yesterday, with 80 degree early morning temps, and air nearly as thick as jello, I decided I'd take my workout indoors today. I stayed away from the treadmill because a) I really don't enjoy it b)I've ran a lot this week and am a little bit sore from a NROLFW workout yesterday and c) I can't read on the treadmill. After seeing Harry Potter last weekend, I started reading the books all over again. Oh, how I love Harry Potter. Anyways, I did a 60 minute elliptical workout. I usually find the elliptical boring, but how can one be bored immersed in the wonderful world of Harry Potter? : ) Overall, it was a good workout. Even in the air conditioned gym, I managed to get my sweat on.

This book always elicits such memories

of the 3rd grade...1st time I read it when 

my teacher read this book aloud to us!

Once I got home from the gym, I showered, and then headed to lunch with the madre. She brought me to a small cafe called Penny Cluse. I love this place! It's so quaint, always crowded, and features local, fresh, mainly organic food.

Scrambled egg whites and whole wheat toast with 

jam and peanut butter (The pb was a dollar extra

but totally worth it...gotta get my healthy fats on!)

No meal is complete without humungo side of fresh fruit! (Sorry

for the blurry iphone pics)

After lunch, I helped my mom shop for two new chairs for our front lawn. She finally settled on two cream colored Adirondack chairs. My mom opted out of paying the extra $30 dollars per chair for assembly, so my dad's going to have fun tomorrow magically turning about 40 pieces of wood and 80 screws into two chairs.

My mom and I also stopped at Old Navy. I spent some time looking around, and initially I didn't find much. While I was waiting for my mom, though, I wandered into the children's section and saw some great sales. Then a great idea dawned on me...I could probably fit into a kid's XL. I found a few shirts and was too lazy to try them on, so I compared them to the adult smalls, and guess what? They were the same size!

Shopping in the kid's section? No shame...No shame....

Finally, I made a stop at the grocery store with my mom to pick up some major foodage for the week ahead....gotta stay fueled to keep up with all the kiddos!

When I got home, I spent about an hour chilling in the hammock, once again immersed in the world of Harry Potter. I just started reading the Sorcerer's Stone yesterday (for about the millionth time), and I'm already 2/3rds of the way through. It's amazing how fast I can breeze through a good book.

Around 6:30, dinner was calling my name. I was feeling kind of lazy tonight, so I microwaved an Amy's Teryaki Bowl and threw in some steamed microwaved Green Giant veggies. Hommade, no? Yummy, yes!

Easy peasy meal

I rounded my night off by watching Rango with my dad. The verdict??? I am a huge sucker for Children's animations, especially of the computerized (is that a word?) variety, but this one was a little bit to....out there....for me.

Now, I'm catching up on some blogs and enjoying this baby, which looks a lot like breakfast, which is fine by me.

Chobani vanilla greek yogurt, chopped up chocolate Vitatop, and 

PB&CO. mighty maple PB

Tomorrow, I'm either going to run in the morning or go on a long bike ride with my dad. The heat is finally supposed to break tomorrow. It's only supposed to be in the low 80s! Later, I'm going to grab a bite to eat with a friend and then head to the movies. I really want to see Winnie the Pooh, but no one really wants to see it with me. I think my friend and I are either going to see Harry Potter again or Horrible Bosses.

Enjoy the remainder of your weekend!

Questions: 
1)What's your favorite digital animation movie?
2)Any fun plans for Sunday?

Silly Kristy

When I originally started thinking about this post, I wanted to call it "Stupid Kristy"--well because I'm a little angry at myself about a decision I made last night. After thinking about it, though, I realized it does no good to beat myself up emotionally about a decision I made. Even if I wish I would have "decided" differently, it's in the past now, and the only thing I can do is move forward.

Okay, before you click away from my page because you are completely confused and have no idea what I'm talking about let me explain...

For starters, I did go to the pot luck party after I got out of work last night, and I had a pretty good time. The hostess of the party is vegan, so there were plenty of healthy options at the party. The offerings included a cous-cous salad, fresh veggies and hummus, corn on the cob, roasted potatoes, and much-much more. For dessert, there were cupcakes of many different varieties and the chocolate chip cookies I brought. Since I decided to have a beer or two last night, I didn't really partake in dessert. I had a couple bites of a cookie, but honestly, the heat turned my appetite off basically. Anyways, the party was fun, and I got to catch up with some friends that I haven't seen in a couple weeks. I wish I would have taken some pictures because the pot luck was honestly too cute for words.

So...why am I mad at myself  do I regret the decision I made last night??? Well, let me bring you back to earlier in the day yesterday. At work yesterday, I was invited to go out with a group of my coworkers last night. A group of us who are 21 and over have been talking about going out for a while. When last night was decided as "the night" yesterday, I wasn't sure if I would originally go or not. After all, I had just worked 50 hours and I was already committed to my friend's pot luck party. When people kept asking me if I was coming or not yesterday, though, I finally caved in and asked what time everyone was planning on going out. To my surprise, people told me between 9pm and 10pm. In my book, that is really early, which is a great thing because I'm not a night owl to be honest. My old roommates and good friends at school usually don't go out 12pm at the earliest. Going out so late always presents a huge challenge for me, so I was pleasantly surprised to find out that my coworkers weren't of the same breed as many of my friends at school. Because of this, I said I'd probably go out with them after the potluck party.

Okay, I'm about to sound like a middle school girl, but the only reason I really wanted to go out with my coworkers was because--well, I have a huge...and I mean huge--crush on the other assistant director. While I am the assistant director of counselors and campers, he is the assistant director of activities and activity leaders. He's super cute, great with kids, and plans to go to med school. He's super nice too. I knew he was planning on going out, so I definitely was interested in spending time with him outside of work.

During the potluck party last night, his name came up because a lot of my friends know him and think he is a really super guy. They all encouraged me to go out with him last night. To be honest, though, I was super tired and kind of just wanted to go home. When I got a text from this guy around 9:00, though, saying that everyone was going out at 11:00, I was super torn as to weather I should just head home or stick around and then go out later in the night. Although I really wanted to go out with him, doing so would push me way out of my comfort zone. Although I go out occasionally, I almost always go out with my group of good friends, we get ready together, go to the bars together, go home together, etc. Doing everything by myself and meeting my group of coworkers at the bars just didn't feel right to me.

Around 9:30, I decided to just head home, even though this guy was texting me, telling me how much fun going out would be. Once I got home, I kind of regretted my decision to go home, immediately. To make matters worse, I woke up at 4:30 this morning to a text from one of my friends who went out and ran into him (the two are good friends). Apparently, he was asking my friend where I was and why I didn't go out.

To sum it up, I feel pretty stupid silly for choosing the comfort of my routine and for sticking with the familiar instead of taking a risk and going out with my coworkers, including the guy I really like. Although I know I had some good reasons, not to go.....

I was exhausted because I had been up since 5AM and had just completed a 50 hour work week


I didn't look that great because I never got a chance to go home, straighten my hair, do my makeup properly, etc.


Didn't have anyone to walk to the bars with (although I probably could have found someone)


Didn't want to drink more than a beer or two because I was planning on driving home that night (I could have stayed at my sorority house--seeing a lot of my friends lived there, and I used to live there)


I know that the eating disorder side of my brain also played into my decision....


Extra drinks mean more calories


Staying out later will disrupt my Saturday routine


I might not make it to the gym the next day


My good friends won't be there for support


All in all, I think I partly made a reasonable decision, but I also think that I partly didn't go out because of fear. I can't dwell, though; it's not the end of the world. I still am working with this guy, and there will probably be other opportunities to go out. And even if there aren't, I still have a lot of other things going for me...

I'm physically healthy


I have a family who loves me


I have good friends


I am in College and am close to being finished


I have a great job


I have dorky but lovable pets


The list goes on and on! Sorry that this post is picture-less. I have food post coming the evening of tomorrow morning.

Hot!

Hello bloggers,

I'm sure the title of this post is pretty self-explanitory. It's hot, and by hot, I mean really really hot! I believe our high today was 98 degrees or something crazy like that. The heat index reached 105 degrees!

I guess it was a good day to visit an ice cream factory then, right? Well, sort of. At camp, we took the kiddos to the Ben and Jerry's factory which is about a 40 minute bus ride from camp. Because of the long bus ride, we wanted to give the kids a lot of time at the factory. We were there from 10-2. Although it was cool in the factory, we spent most of our time outside, eating lunch, playing on the playground, seeing the cows, and visiting the flavor graveyard. Basically, we were outside for 3 and a half out of the 4 hours we were there. 

Despite the extremely hot temperatures, the trip was really fun! We got to sample ice cream. More specifically, we got to be taste testers and got to sample the Americone Dream  flavor. It was really good! The flavor was comprised of vanilla ice cream, a caramel swirl, and chocolate covered waffle cone pieces. Although I was perfectly satisfied with the sample, a lot of the campers were disappointed because we didn't actually get to have ice cream cones. Last year we did because we went on a slow day and they gave us free coupons. That didn't happen this year, and at 4 dollars a pop, it wasn't in the camp budget to purchase 120 ice cream cones for staff and campers. 480 dollars for ice cream....well worth it in my opinion : )

Aren't they precious?

It's Ben and Jerry! Not really, but on a side note, I did 

go to high school with Jerry's son. 

After a 5AM run this morning, working from 6:45am to 4:30pm, I'm pooped. I'm currently vegetating in the comforts of my air conditioned home. I'm doing some laundry and doing some planning for work tomorrow. Pretty soon, I'm going to make myself some dinner, do some reading, watch Jeopardy of course, and go to bed! 

I have to gear up for my super long day tomorrow. I'll be up at 5AM for work, work all day, go to an appointment right after work, and then straight to my friend's pot luck party. Some of my coworkers invited me out to the bars tomorrow night too. Whether I partake in that activity or not, I still probably be out n' about until at least 11:00 or 12:00. Super long day!!! It's okay, though, because I'm planning on relaxing the rest of the weekend. 

Hopefully, I can drag someone along to see Winnie the Pooh with me. I know it's for kids, but the preview makes me want to cry. I'm a baby...haha. 

Sorry for the post; I'm just beat. I wanted to talk about something more serious today, but I really feel like typing up a big, long, complicated post. I'll fill you in soon, though. Just some family issues I've been worried about. 

It's almost the weekend!

Questions:

1)What's your favorite ice cream flavor? Ben and Jerry's...I'd have to say Half Baked. Any other brand....I love me some cake batter (I don't like Ben and Jerry's, though...too sweet). Oh, and I also love creemees. Unfortunately, I'm lactose intolerant, though, so too much ice cream makes my tummy blow up like a ballon! No fun. 

2) What movies do you secretly love? Homeward Bound is an all time favorite of mine. 

WIAW~Lunchbox Edition

Happy Wednesday everybody!

I'm officially writing my first What I Ate Wednesday post. This post is going to be rather short though because I am beyond exhausted and still have two more long days of work to get through. Before I jump into  my eats, though, I just wanted to mention my plans for Friday night. After writing up that post, I got a text from a friend inviting me to a pot luck/birthday party Friday night. There was no need to worry about not finding anything to do. Now I need to stop myself from worrying about getting to bed at a decent hour, so I can run Saturday morning and get on with my day or about being too tired to enjoy myself Friday night. I'm not going to think about Friday night until Friday....period!

Anyways, my morning started at the glorious hour of 5AM. I got up, made myself a cup of coffee (unpictured-it was too early for pictures), checked my email, threw my stuff together, and got ready to get out the door to make it to a 6:30 AM staff meeting. Before leaving, however, I managed to find the time to unpack my lunchbox to take some pictures of my packed food for the day. I do apologize for the subpar pictures. 

My Vera Bradley Lunch Box

I made it to work in time for my staff meeting and helped lead it since I'm an assistant director this year. Afterwards, I was starving, so I devoured my packed Clif Bar and banana. Once I finished my rather boring breakfast, I was busy checking campers in and informing my counselors of the "game plan" -so to speak-for the day. 

Peanut Butter Clif Bar & a 'nanner

Once all the campers were checked in, I took my lunch break bright and early to crank out a 4 mile run. I have to admit that it wasn't my best run. Although I was energized and ready to run, it was already pretty hot by 8:00 AM. I also just felt like I was moving in slow motion. I think I need to give my legs a break. It's hard, though, because I feel obligated to run when I'm scheduled to. And, during the week, I only have 40 minute blocks of time (really less when you consider prepping for a run) to devote to running. Since I have such short blocks of time, I can't run very long or far....thus I feel obligated to run often to get my miles in. 

Anyways, after my run, I met my campers down at the pool and gladly jumped in the cold water. My camp takes place at my college's athletic facility, so we use a NCAA pool, which has to be kept on the cold side for all of the beastly swimmers who create heat while swimming their tail ends off. After pool time, I quickly showered. 

I spent the next hour or so in the office, taking care of administrative duties. My campers ate snack and went to arts and crafts during this time. Once I got my boring paper work and phone calls out of the way, I got my group together to make a book list of their favorite books. The teacher in me had to make sure all my kiddos are doing some reading this summer. Surprisingly, a lot of them had a lot of good book suggestions, which shows me they love reading! 

Okay, I'm rambling. I apologize. Let's move onto lunch. 

2 Pita sandwiches-1 with peanut butter and Jelly and

the other with Brown and Brummel spread and cinnamon, 

chocolate pudding, and a big old pink lady apple!

All enjoyed in outside in the lovely 90 degree weather. At least we sat in the shade and their was a nice breeze. 

After lunch, we played some soccer, and I organized some water games for my campers to cool off. Unfortunately, 7 and 8 year olds take a long time to change and apply sunscreen, so we didn't have much time to actually play the water games. I had to get all my campers ready for edible craft club. They made these pretty awesome (but rather gross looking) bracelets, faces, and random creations out of apples, fruit loops, peanut butter, caramel, twirlers, and skittles. I wish I could have taken some pictures for you all. 

Unfortunately, while they were playing with their food, I was busy dealing with a troublesome camper. I did get a chance to have an afternoon snack, though. I had to stay fueled!

Kashi-Fire Roasted Veggie Crackers and some super sweet baby 

carrots

I ended my work day by putting together field trip packets for my counselors. We are going to the Ben and Jerry's factory tomorrow! I had to break all the campers into groups, make schedules, and figure out logistics and such. I'm super excited for tomorrow! 

Once I got home from camp, I showered, packed lunch for tomorrow, and then continued doing some planning for the rest of the camp week. 

I just enjoyed this lovely dinner cooked by mi madre!

Pita tacos-2 whole wheat pitas, salsa, Gimme Lean faux ground beef, 

and shredded cheddar cheese with a side salad....yum!

Now, I'm going to read a little bit. I'm almost done Handle With Care! Then I'm going to watch Jepordy (my secret obsession), read some blogs, and hit the hay!

Oh, before I go to bed, I'll also nosh on some Chobani vanilla Yogurt, a chocolate Vitatop, and some PB&Co. Mighty Maple Peanut butter. This snack make an appearance almost nightly in this house!

Happy Hump Day everyone!

Please click the little box above the picture to get to the link...I'm trying to figure out how to get the picture to work.)

Questions: 

1) What are some good and easy to-go breakfasts?

2) I don't think I'm linking this What I Ate Wednesday thing right. Any advice?

3) Do any thing special or exciting today?

www.peasandcrayons.com

Last Friday Night...

Yea, we danced on tabletops, 


And we took too many shots, 


Think we kissed, but I forgot!


Last Friday night, I did none of this. Instead, I stayed home, watched some Tivo-ed Jeopardy shows, read a little, caught up on some blogs, and was in bed by the crazy hour of 10:30pm. In other words, I took some much needed me time Friday night.

And, you know what? I'm glad I did. After a 50 hour work week, I was in definite need of some me time. Usually, however, I don't stay in on Friday nights. Even if I have been up since 5am and have worked an 11 hour day, I still feel the need to do something on Friday night and be a "normal" college student. For some reason, I feel like I've failed if I don't have plans on Friday nights.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not one to always stay in on Friday nights. When I was in the depths of my eating disorder, I almost always stayed in on Friday nights. In the past year, I've had some wild, crazy, and super fun Friday nights, though! Some of my favorite friday nights...

Getting away from school to spend

a night in the wilderness (or a lake house...

close enough : )) 

Flying down to D.C. to visit one of my best friends 

at school for the weekend...and then spending Friday 

night going out in the city!

Getting dressed up to the nines and acting like children!

Going to the Hardrock Cafe for dinner and then acting 

as if the building itself is a playground!

Spending a Friday night on the lake with some best 

friends (of course S'mores were consumed later in the

night). 

Welcoming some awesome new members to my Sorority

Dressing up for Spring Formal 

I guess I need to learn that it's okay if not every Friday night is super exciting. There's nothing wrong with spending Friday night by myself and watching reruns of Say Yes to the Dress! I also need to work on not worrying about Friday night ahead of time. Last week, I had to make a conscious decision to stay in and accept it. I often worry that if I stay in, it is because of my eating disorder. I spent the better part of the second half of last week worrying about what would happen if I stayed in Friday night. Would I end up wasting my whole weekend?

You know what happened?

I got some much needed me time...

got up early the next morning, went on a 20 mile bike ride with my dad, then went to lunch with him, helped him run errands and saw Harry Potter!

Then on Sunday, I spent the day downtown with two of my oldest and best friends.

In other words, everything turned out perfectly fine! There was no need to worry in the first place.

So, why on my way home from work today did I find myself already worrying about what I would do this Friday night?

Maybe, I can get one of my friends to go see the Winnie the Pooh movie with me?

Maybe, I'll hang out with my college friends (who are here for the summer) and go to the bars with them?

But, what if I'm up too late?

What I drink too much and don't feel like running in the morning?

What I don't drink at all, so I can make it home and don't have a good time?

Or maybe I can go to a friend's house and have pizza and watch a movie?

But wait, I'm going to have Pizza on Thursday....Is it really okay to eat Pizza two nights in a row??

STOP....Dear Brain, thank you for your input, but please shut the **** up! It's Tuesday. I still have three days of work to get through before I need to worry about Friday night. I should really start worrying about Friday night on Friday afternoon....not on Tuesday.

Even though I know this, I guess I feel more in control if I worry about it, and try to start making plans now. You know what, though? I'm really just going to stress myself out more. I'll probably make plans and they will change. So I'm just going to go with the flow, roll with the punches, and worry about here and now. And, if I don't end up doing something on Friday night, it's not the end of the world!

Okay, well I have stuff to do, so I'm going to stop rambling.

Before I go, though, I just wanted to touch on something in regards to yesterday's post. I did end up running. Not only that, but I did so bright and early. I went to bed super early last night and woke up feeling energized and whipped out a 4 mile run in about 34 minutes. There was no reason to obsess about this yesterday. I listened to my body (my body wanted to run early), devoted my attention to running while I was running, and that was that. Now, I need to stop thinking about tomorrow's run.

4 miles...check! And it's not even 6:30 

yet! 

Bye blog-a-boos!

Do you ever worry about what you are going to do on Friday nights way ahead of time?

How do you handle early morning runs?