Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Last Friday Night...

Yea, we danced on tabletops, 


And we took too many shots, 


Think we kissed, but I forgot!


Last Friday night, I did none of this. Instead, I stayed home, watched some Tivo-ed Jeopardy shows, read a little, caught up on some blogs, and was in bed by the crazy hour of 10:30pm. In other words, I took some much needed me time Friday night.

And, you know what? I'm glad I did. After a 50 hour work week, I was in definite need of some me time. Usually, however, I don't stay in on Friday nights. Even if I have been up since 5am and have worked an 11 hour day, I still feel the need to do something on Friday night and be a "normal" college student. For some reason, I feel like I've failed if I don't have plans on Friday nights.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not one to always stay in on Friday nights. When I was in the depths of my eating disorder, I almost always stayed in on Friday nights. In the past year, I've had some wild, crazy, and super fun Friday nights, though! Some of my favorite friday nights...
Getting away from school to spend
a night in the wilderness (or a lake house...
close enough : )) 

Flying down to D.C. to visit one of my best friends 
at school for the weekend...and then spending Friday 
night going out in the city!

Getting dressed up to the nines and acting like children!

Going to the Hardrock Cafe for dinner and then acting 
as if the building itself is a playground!

Spending a Friday night on the lake with some best 
friends (of course S'mores were consumed later in the
night). 

Welcoming some awesome new members to my Sorority

Dressing up for Spring Formal 


I guess I need to learn that it's okay if not every Friday night is super exciting. There's nothing wrong with spending Friday night by myself and watching reruns of Say Yes to the Dress! I also need to work on not worrying about Friday night ahead of time. Last week, I had to make a conscious decision to stay in and accept it. I often worry that if I stay in, it is because of my eating disorder. I spent the better part of the second half of last week worrying about what would happen if I stayed in Friday night. Would I end up wasting my whole weekend?

You know what happened?

I got some much needed me time...

got up early the next morning, went on a 20 mile bike ride with my dad, then went to lunch with him, helped him run errands and saw Harry Potter!

Then on Sunday, I spent the day downtown with two of my oldest and best friends.

In other words, everything turned out perfectly fine! There was no need to worry in the first place.

So, why on my way home from work today did I find myself already worrying about what I would do this Friday night?

Maybe, I can get one of my friends to go see the Winnie the Pooh movie with me?

Maybe, I'll hang out with my college friends (who are here for the summer) and go to the bars with them?

But, what if I'm up too late?

What I drink too much and don't feel like running in the morning?

What I don't drink at all, so I can make it home and don't have a good time?

Or maybe I can go to a friend's house and have pizza and watch a movie?

But wait, I'm going to have Pizza on Thursday....Is it really okay to eat Pizza two nights in a row??

STOP....Dear Brain, thank you for your input, but please shut the **** up! It's Tuesday. I still have three days of work to get through before I need to worry about Friday night. I should really start worrying about Friday night on Friday afternoon....not on Tuesday.

Even though I know this, I guess I feel more in control if I worry about it, and try to start making plans now. You know what, though? I'm really just going to stress myself out more. I'll probably make plans and they will change. So I'm just going to go with the flow, roll with the punches, and worry about here and now. And, if I don't end up doing something on Friday night, it's not the end of the world!

Okay, well I have stuff to do, so I'm going to stop rambling.

Before I go, though, I just wanted to touch on something in regards to yesterday's post. I did end up running. Not only that, but I did so bright and early. I went to bed super early last night and woke up feeling energized and whipped out a 4 mile run in about 34 minutes. There was no reason to obsess about this yesterday. I listened to my body (my body wanted to run early), devoted my attention to running while I was running, and that was that. Now, I need to stop thinking about tomorrow's run.

4 miles...check! And it's not even 6:30 
yet! 

Bye blog-a-boos!

Do you ever worry about what you are going to do on Friday nights way ahead of time?

How do you handle early morning runs?



2 comments:

  1. I can relate to this post so so much. I actually wrote something similar to this a few months ago... about the guilt I feel when I stay in on weekend nights. I feel like I should be the "typical" young person who goes out as much as she can and parties and drinks, etc. But I really do enjoy staying in a majority of the time. I know a lot of that has to do with my disordered eating, but I am at least getting over that.
    Now when I do go out, I prepare ahead of time too! I have to tell my irrational, illogical brain to simmer down too, enough with these ridiculous thought!

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  2. I know. Friday nights are supposed to be fun....not stressful. It's kind of funny. Just after I posted this, I got an invite to a friend's birthday on Friday night. Now, instead of worrying about having nothing to do, I'm stressed about being tied down to these plans. I just need to live in the now and be happy!

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